Aside

Moments

I’m trying.
I don’t know why or what for I just wanted you to know
I’m trying.
I’m trying to be happy
To be human
To be me
And somehow I’m finding that very difficult,
But I know I’m not the only one
so in least I’m not alone.
Because how can you be alone here?
We’re compromised of stars recycled into souls
Consisting of particles twinned with those we love most
Even if we haven’t met them yet.
We’re graced with neuron light shows when we shut the world away
Entranced by the visual snow
open eyes would never understand.
So how can we ever have the audacity to feel alone?
When we are made up of atoms and atoms make us Matter
Because we matter.
That can never be taken away
It can’t be created or destroyed
It can only exist in that moment
In the second the hand ticks
In the blink of an eye
or in the hug of breath around a birthday cakes candle.
Its an eternal state of temporary
So prepared to feel lost
Prepare to feel the pull of life as it drags you down
As it slows time before stopping it altogether
Be prepared for that moment
And if that moment isn’t good enough
And if it begins to tear you apart
Then become a quasar.
Be prepared to change
Because that’s when you shine brightest
When awe-struck suns freeze before fervently taking notes in desperation to compare
Let scientists campaign on chat shows in attempts to gain your vote all on the off chance you’ll whisper them your secrets in understanding your light,
Because its the light that people see.
And I can guarantee they’re basking in it
Like ghosts tanning to color , Sun bathing in
Your knowledge
Absorbing all the rays they can get
So in turn they can learn to emit their own warmth
And if your light begins to subdue
Surround yourself  with people who’ll return the favour
And if your light begins to die
They’ll lend you theirs
Re-sparking the flame as if alighting a candle with hope in hospital waiting rooms
as visitors beg ‘Never let your light die out’
And you won’t
Because if laughing for 20 minutes adds 5 years to your life
then at this rate you’re immortal
You’re fearless like a lion
but remember
Don’t let your pride be your fall
Don;t obey some circus whip ass you reach for fame
Only to snap like a branch under pressure that crushes you as you cry
I tried mother, I tried
Because you’re not doing this for them.
You’re doing this for you
So stand stronger than Everest and watch as people try to conquer your greatest peaks
Be as accepting as a river is to diversity
And never let your waters choke on the pollution from the industrialized excuses politicians promote
Be authentic in your words and in turn your honesty
will be rewarded with wisdom
Surrender yourself to simplicity
And watch as all the clutter gets thrown away
Do your best to be every moment
and if you can’t
then try.
So please, please appreciate what I’m trying to tell you
and what I’m telling you is
I’m trying.

 

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